S-E-X

Sex.  My husband and I had quite the conversation about sex today while driving in the minivan on the way home from lunch with the childrens in the back seat. Classy, I know.

We started talking about facebook and how I threatened to ban him from my Twins Happen facebook page because he doesn’t like it when I post pictures of completely unattainable celebrity men I might find attractive.  I don’t see a problem with it, he thinks its disrespectful.  So until the day when I get enough cajones to actually follow through with my little threat and hit the “ban” button, or just hack his account and unlike the page, there shall be no pictures of pretty celebrity men.  Sad.

But I digress.

So there we were discussing the banning of people from facebook pages and he, in all his genuis manly glory asks, ”So, if I ban you, will facebook say I’m single again?”

Me:  ”You can try it.  IF you don’t want to get lucky again, like, EVER.”

Him:  ”Pssshhhh, you wouldn’t last 2 weeks.”

Me, chuckling:  ”Really, you think I, as in me, as in your wife, would be unable to go more than two weeks without the hanky panky?  Seriously.”

Him, looking impossibly smug and deadly serious:  ”No I don’t think you could last more than two weeks.”

Me, equally smug and even more serious: “Wanna bet?”

Any odds on this one?

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About Andrea


Andrea is a 35 year old mother to 5 year old twin boys, a wife, a devout Catholic, a web designer, entrepreneur and speaker. You can view all of her projects at andreaboring.com.

Comments

  1. Sarah M. says

    Ok. You have officially lost your mind. Why in the world would you want to go without love from your awesome man, even on a bet? Orgasms are amazing, and make you a better mother! Seriously!

    • says

      I would have to agree that, within the bounds of morality, experiencing as many orgasms as possible in a lifetime is a good idea. And for me personally, what a coping mechanism for dealing with everything else I have to do!

  2. says

    I know this is meant as humor, but it seems like the wrong attitude about the gift of yourselves to each other, and the continual renewal of your sacrament, that sex represents.

  3. says

    Oh Sugar! I am with you!! Farmer Bob and I joke about this all the time! He knows my Facebook page is all for fun and he giggles at all the pictures of Johnny and other nice looking men. He knows that even if the opportunity were to EVER present its self, I would never in a million years even think about leaving him. OK, maybe for Johnny I would consider it. But aren’t we just looking at faces? I imagine Johnny as a super cool dude, but he could be a total jerk for all I know. Sometimes money and fame can do that to people. As far as banning. I believe that is a total agreement between the two of you. Bob is fine with what I post. If he thinks something is dirty, he just shakes his head, but he knows it is mine and if he doesn’t want in on it, he can leave. I love your sense of humor, and know that you are simply fabulous!! Joking with your husband, even about the withholding of sex, makes the sex even better in my opinion!!

  4. says

    Must find a way to work this little bet into a conversation. Only…I know the hubs would NEVER threaten me with it…He doesn’t get it enough as it is!

  5. says

    Normally I do not read what others comment before I comment myself… I like my comments are fresh and not influenced by others say (I read what others say afterwards)… But today, I was at a lost for words. It’s been such a long time since I used this tool LOL! Which reminded me that I am getting old… hahaha The sex drive isn’t what is used to be… so if I ever “get in the mood” well I welcome it with open arms. LOL! I know too much info huh?

  6. says

    So I just spent like twenty minutes typing a brilliant (yes, I am THAT vain!) response and it didn’t post. It is probably better that it didn’t since I wrote about sister-wives and a time in my life when I would have been HAPPY to have someone else…take care of my husband for me because I had a 1,2,and 3 year old at home (we were blessed with the second two WHILE on and using birth control…talk about too much info…!) and the thought of a fourth was enough to dry me up for a century (was that too crass? Sorry!)! Also, I could barely hold my head up most nights because I was so exhausted–there were few things I wanted to do less than having sex! Good for those women who take their sex lives so seriously! Like Carla said–I usually don’t read other comments, but I was interested to see that most of your readers think that you couldn’t (nor would you want to) go without it for two weeks. I am pretty sure I went months–years even– and really thought that most mothers with multiple children (because that seems to be when I stopped wanting to do it) felt the same way about it! Only recently (my children are now 5,6, and 7) has it begun to come back again, but I would still prefer a nap if given the choice! I TOTALLY think you will win this–people are also underestimating a woman’s ability to do whatever possible to prove her husband wrong…

  7. One tired mama says

    Very interesting…you have to keep us posted on the outcome of this. I think there is a difference of posting men all the time and how they are dressed and what is said. I don’t post too many. Only of Johhny, ESP when IKTHAYHT shares him! As for the bet, he will lose. It’s all in the mind for us so we have more control. 2 weeks? Pshhhh, nothing!

  8. Shannon says

    I once heard a great line in a show, “Never make your wife responsible for her own orgasms”, in this case, I’d make myself responsible for as long as necessary just to prove him wrong!

  9. Donna S. says

    So for me, I’d fail miserably, he’d win and never… and I mean NEVER let me live it down. Because I’m a super snooping, present shaker and if you tell me I can’t have something I obsess about it until I get it. Sick and twisted, yes, but if I made a bet for no nooky… I know I’d give in about 3 days in. I’d have to tease and taunt him too so that would make it worse. Torturing him is my #1 goal in life… I’m really good at it too… but in this case it would backfire and I’d jump him like ‘Johnny’. BTW, what’s wrong with posting hot pics of unattainable guys? If it gets you ‘in the mood’ who cares how you got there, long as you don’t call him the wrong name ‘during’. LMAO GOOD LUCK!!! ;D Stay strong Sista!

  10. says

    I say go for the ban, because the fun at the end when you finally give in is so worth the ban for a few weeks, I know some say why give up the fun, but the teasing and the fun leading up to the ban ending will also do you good
    Boysmum2 recently posted..U is for UsefulMy Profile

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